A Little Tattoo Humor

Some Simple Rules To Follow While Getting Tattooed:

(a.k.a. a little tattoo humor)


- Do not move or talk with your hands, tense your muscles or sing out to 

your mate to get you a beer. 

- Do not fart or burp in the tattooist’s face. 

- Do not ask the tattooist how long it took to get his tattoos done or how 

much they cost. 

- Do not ask the tattooist how long his prick is. 

- Do not ask the tattooist how many tattoos he does a day or how much 

money he makes. 

- Do not ask the tattooist what the different machines are for. 

- Do not ask the tattooist what sort of ink he uses. 

- Do not ask the tattooist how he got into tattooing. 

- Do not ask the tattooist if he tattoos dicks. (He may say "I'm doing one 

right now.”) 

- Do not ask the tattooist's wife or girlfriend for a fuck. 

- Do not tell the tattooist that you have a mate who can draw really good 

and would make a great tattooist, if only someone would give him a go.

- Do not tell the tattooist the story of the guy who made a tattoo gun out of 

cassette, motor, toothbrush, and a guitar string. 

- Do not tell the tattooist that it doesn't hurt anymore.

- Please Do Not Attempt To Heckle The Artist, As He Is Armed And 

Under The Influence Of Prozac.

  • Finally it is done! You look at the finished tattoo and it exceeds all 

your wildest expectations. It shines like gold and you marvel at the 

precision, the artistry, the skill application, and the bright colors.

You may at this point tell the tattooist any of the following:

- Its beautiful, its excellent, its brilliant, its fantastic! 

- I love it, you are a genius, you are a true, gifted artist, its better than I 

ever hoped for! 

- You are the most brilliant and talented artistic genius in the whole world 

and I will be eternally grateful to you for the rest of my life! 

- Here's a $100 tip for doing such a great job!

- All Other Questions Are Subject To Charge As Follows:

  • Answers- $10

  • Correct Answers- $20

  • Dumb Looks Are Still Free.
SACRED saint LOGO Blacky
All artwork and tattooing by Brandon Notch aka:Sacred Saint (copyright) Sacred Saint Studio and Art Gallery CA.